TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I'm just crazy horny about you
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
