Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
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