I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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