WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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