k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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