I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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