I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Randomize
