So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
