I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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