We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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