the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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