this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
