I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
only you would photoshop your dick
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
