wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
We don't watch enough power rangers
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
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