I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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