She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
handjob tips. give me some.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
