Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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