do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
