new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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