If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize