Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
