I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
operation harelip BJ is a go
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
The beer is more important than you right now.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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