I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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