You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
