ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
