Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I need to calm my uterus...
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
