dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Duck Duck Cougar?
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
