Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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