maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
