my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
she told me i tasted like america
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
