i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
