No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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