We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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