dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Let's get the cat blown out
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
