It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
