I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
