Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
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