then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
