i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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