another moral hangover. fuck.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Randomize
