How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Randomize
