Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Randomize
