His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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