Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I need moral support for this bender
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
