It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
i need some magic done to my vagina
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
