His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
