My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
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