how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
