either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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