I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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